Developing Alternatives

There are only a few things you can be certain about in life, I know death and taxes, tell me something new… In divorce even death will not save you.  The only thing you can be certain of is that things will change. Circumstances in your divorce change continuously and it is important to keep with the flow and to try to get ahead of it.  I used to call it the trauma du jour.

What is the latest issue coming at you? How can you deal with it to either make it go away or to deal with the issue so that it does not come back at you. It is rather like cleaning up your kitchen counter,   if you can handle things once rather than putting them in a pile to deal with later, the mess goes away permanently, albeit a little more slowly.

So when something comes at you, think about ways to deal with the issue once.  Develop alternatives that you can present to your X.  If there are alternatives it will be easier for the other party to pick one rather than being presented with only one way you find acceptable.  Try not to put things off to deal with that in mediation or court, getting issues off the table will reduce your legal costs and shorten the time frame.

Developing alternatives is one of the best things you can do to help your divorce along

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