Blog
Sell or Keep the House? – That is the Question
The house is one of the most difficult assets to deal with in a divorce. People do not get emotional about shares of Apple or GE but ask them about the house and they have definite and usually emotional responses. Most time the house needs to be sold as it is...
Suggestions from Arianna Huffington’s new Book “Thrive”
I saw this great post on LinkedIn today; “Let's Stop the Glorification of Busy” by Guy Kawasaki. He was taking excerpts from Arianna Huffington’s new Book “Thrive: The Third Metric to Redefining Success and Creating a Life of Well-Being, Wisdom, and Wonder”. and...
Focus on the good, not the bad
I had just begun to work with a client when he cancelled our sessions. Normally, I am sad to see a client leave me but I was overjoyed with his reason. He had decided to give it another go with his spouse, to see if he could make things work. Excellent news! Divorce...
Be Careful of What You Ask For
I was recently helping one of my clients with the text of her certification for her lawyer to put in court documents. The first draft of the document contained a brain dump of all the ills that had occurred over the past few months in her divorce. While it may have...
Thanksgiving – Holy Crow (Turkey?) it’s That Time of Year!
Thanksgiving is a really difficult holiday when you are going through a divorce. So many family memories and traditions revolve around this day. What happened in the past may not be doable anymore. Perhaps the whole family gathered at your Mother-in-law’s house and...
Parenting Schedules – Keep Your Children’s Needs First
The more I work with clients the more I realize that keeping the focus on the needs of the children makes the process a whole lot easier. This is what you do. Find a blank monthly calendar, search on google (link to excel...
Time – Friend or Foe?
Is time on your side during your divorce? During the negotiation stage of your divorce I would have to say a big NO!! The longer it takes to get through your negotiations the more you will spend Pendente Lite support “maintains the marital lifestyle” and it does not...
Parent of Primary Residence
The designation of a parent as the “parent of primary residence” (PPR) or “parent of alternate residence” (PAR) is giving me angst. I have clients in a panic regarding getting this designation. I want to make sure that this is a battle worth fighting. I have received...
Get Your Independence “Day” From Anger
OK so I am taking the advice of my social media too literally capitalizing on July 4th… One of the best things you can do for yourself is to get free from the anger you carry from your divorce. Anger can consume you, certain problems become a mantra that you repeat...
Father’s Day –Being the Better Man
Father’s Day, the day we celebrate dad. Thank him for all he has done for us and rejoice in his company. This is a time, when you have to remember that your X is not your dad he is your children’s dad and they want to celebrate the holiday. So you have to “man up”...
Do my children get a say in the custody arrangements?
This is a tricky question, and I do not believe that there is one right answer. Obviously the age of the children is the overriding factor. If they are very young their best interests’ is the most important consideration. However as they get older it is important to...
Calculating child support outside of the guidlines
How do you calculate child support if your earn more than the guidelines? The calculation in NJ is straight forward if your combined family income is less than $187,000. You plug in the details of your parenting time arrangement and respective incomes and the formula...
What bargaining chips do you have?
Divorce is like any other negotiation, both parties have their positions, sometimes well entrenched positions, and ultimately, both parties want to reach an agreement. Getting to that endpoint can be hastened if you build a strategy based on your strengths. So, what...
So you got a judgment, now what?
Sometimes there are no alternatives but to go to court. You and your X are not communicating and there are some pressing issues that need to be addressed. So you and/or your lawyer fire up a motion, a cross motion is fired back and eventually the court provides you...
Keep your nose clean!
At any stage in your divorce, be it in prior to filing, in the midst of the negotiations or after you are done and trying to live with the terms of your settlement, you have to follow the terms so that you do not put yourself in a bad position. Sometimes it may seem...
How will I live during the divorce?
Very common question from both the working and home-employed spouse. Most folks, tend to spend their income so whether you have one income or two there will be a change; One household is now two and the same income has to be divided So hopefully you had a plan in...
Eliminating your “bull in the china shop” Responses
Your X does something that enrages you. Every single button that you have has been pushed and you are out for blood. Been there, not a happy place. The natural reaction of striking back can have very damaging implications in terms of your ability to come to a swift...
Developing Alternatives
There are only a few things you can be certain about in life, I know death and taxes, tell me something new… In divorce even death will not save you. The only thing you can be certain of is that things will change. Circumstances in your divorce change continuously...
Download Suzanne’s FREE Top Ten Transition Steps for Children in a Divorce
Here’s my practical list of ways to MAKE LIFE EASIER FOR YOUR CHILDREN. Switching households can be stressful for your children. Using the techniques below will make the day-to-day needs of your kids flow a bit more smoothly: