Blog
Trading the Marital Residence for Retirement Assets – Financial and Tax Issues
The trade - the marital residence for retirement assets is very common in divorce settlement agreements. Often times it driven by one parties desire to keep the home and the only other major asset that is available to compensate the other spouse are retirement...
The angst of sharing your children
I have become aware and, ok from my own experience that people who go through difficult custody battles seem to feel a high degree of anxiety when their children go to see their X. Even though it may have been years since your divorce was settled you may still find...
Switching Households – Top Ten Terriffic Transition Tips – The Short Version
So I cheated. I could have given you all of my "Top Ten Terrific Transition Tips" (sorry could not help myself on the name) a few weeks ago and then have the details follow. So If you missed any of my blogs you can go back and find what you need. This is a practical...
Switching Households Part 10 – Time to settle in
When the kids are moving from one household to the other they will likely be stressed. Did I forget something? I meant to do this or that for mom/dad and I didn’t or wow it is great to be with mom/dad. Whatever the situation they will have a reaction. Give your...
Switching Households Party 9 – Traveling Food
The times typically negotiated for parenting to switch always seems to be around dinner - after work or after school. You are tired and hungry; your kids are tired and hungry… recipe for disaster. This is such an easy fix…. When the kids are in the car on their way to...
Switching Households Part 8 – Rules and Consistency
While this may seem to be a much broader topic it can really help around switching households. Like any parenting, divorced or not, having a set of defined rules and applying them on a consistent basis is good for your children. No kidding! Specific to switching...
Switching Households Part 7 – Video conferencing
Gone are the days of not being able to “see” your children every day. Calling your children on the phone, particularly very young kids, is sometimes challenging as they can lack focus to say much more than “hi and bye”. So upgrade to Video conferencing! Connecting...
Switching Households Part 6 – The Box in the Car
To help minimize the stress and anxiety on your children if they forget something at the other household, and amount of time you spend rushing around and driving back and forth between your place and your X’s use a “Box in the Car”. There may be part of you that says...
Switching Households Part 5 – Clothing Balancing Act
The purpose of these ideas is to make life easier for you and most importantly, your children. I believe that stress is the root cause of illness and unhappiness in our lives so anything you can do to take it down a notch will be worth it. As your children go back...
Switching Households Part 4 – Parenting Calendar
Using a calendar will help your children feel more secure as they attempt to navigate their new world of two homes. The concept is to get a visual outline of the schedule so that they can see at a glance when they will be with each parent. You can purchase a large...
Switching Households Part 2 – Have Two Sets of Everything
Living in two places would be complicated for adults let alone children. Where are my black loafers or where did I leave my gloves? Yet this is exactly the situation all children of divorce face every single day. One of the things you can do to ease this burden is...
Switching Households Part 3 – Traveling Backpack
This simple idea will save you so much time and energy I almost buy one for each one of my clients with children. So what the heck do I mean by a traveling backpack?Parents use a backpack (or other type of bag) to bring items back and forth between households where...
Switching Households – Difficult for You and Your Children
It is switching time for the children and you are at your X’s to pick up your children. The times typically negotiated for parenting switched always seems to be around dinner. Everyone is hungry, stressed and tempers are likely to fly. They forget something and you...
No (Easy) Way Out
Dividing up the assets is the easy part of your divorce; everyone likes to take cash, investments, pension assets and real estate. It is quite another issue to split the debt; particularly credit card debt. The theory is that everything is split 50/50 (equitably in...
DEALING WITH THE STUFF YOUR X SAYS
I spend a lot of my time trying to get people to ignore what their x-spouse says. The stuff that comes out of people’s mouths astounds me sometimes. A soon-to-be-X said that it was the status quo for my client to continue to do his laundry. There was a nasty custody...
Facing the Reality of Your Divorce
Divorce sucks. Sorry, no soft sell today. Regardless of what is in your divorce settlement agreement and despite having a great divorce consultant and attorney, if the other side is unwilling to comply you may find yourself in a tight spot. You go to court, spending...
Conscious Un-coupling
I was interviewed for an article on divorce for the NY Post this week, and was asked what I thought of the term “conscious un-coupling”. New age way of say that you are getting a divorce, or is it something bigger? The term conscious un-coupling implies, at least to...
Re-Living Your Divorce
I have been so amazed by one of my client’s attitudes towards her divorce that I thought I would be beneficial to share her approach. A while ago, I suggested that she attend a divorce support group that I help run. After the first meeting she said that she did not...
Download Suzanne’s FREE Top Ten Transition Steps for Children in a Divorce
Here’s my practical list of ways to MAKE LIFE EASIER FOR YOUR CHILDREN. Switching households can be stressful for your children. Using the techniques below will make the day-to-day needs of your kids flow a bit more smoothly: