Most folks think that their divorce has a life of its own and that they have no control over its direction. Nothing is further from the truth. Eventually the court system will drag you through the process if there has been no action for a while but this is NOT a good way to do things.
Does your car drive you to work without steering it? Do your pots and pans fix you dinner without adding ingredients, heat and preparation? Absurd comparisons? Perhaps a bit out there but I wanted to make a point.
You are responsible for how your divorce goes. You are in control of its direction and for pushing it along. Like your car, if you do not steer you will be lost and it will take forever to get to your destination. Your divorce is the same.
You need to determine what you want and build a step by step plan to get it. An essential part of this plan is to make sure that your lawyer understands your wishes and adheres to them.
Notwithstanding I was a basket case at the beginning of my divorce, I repeatedly asked my lawyer what the plan was, what is the strategy? She looked at me as if I were from Mars. Needless to say we parted company but not before my life’s savings were spent in legal bills.
This is not a fate I wish for any of you and it is why I do what I do.