Divorce is like any other negotiation, both parties have their positions, sometimes well entrenched positions, and ultimately, both parties want to reach an agreement. Getting to that endpoint can be hastened if you build a strategy based on your strengths.
So, what do you have to trade? What do you have to offer the other side to negotiate for what you want? Would you be willing to give up an interest in your X’s pension assets in return for the house even if it was for a lessor dollar amount? Would there be an advantage from a tax perspective?
Would you agree to limit the term of your alimony in exchange for a higher dollar amount or a lump sum payment? If you fully expect to be earning enough to support yourself in a few years or expect to remarry in the near term that might be a good strategy.
What does your X want? Does he really want to keep the collection of “guns/baseball cards/shot glasses/whatever”? Would he be willing to give up more than the value of the stuff to keep it intact as a collection?This tact can be used both ways so you need to be careful to keep your most precious desires to yourself so as not to give the other side something to bargain with.
In a negotiation there is always give and take. In order to reach agreement each side will need to shift their position enough to gain acceptance from the other side or trade one thing for another. Be smart,look at the big picture and develop a strategy to get the best results possible.